Happy Birthday to Me


John Prof 2018

It’s political season.

Political season brings lots of things, including relentless television advertisings featuring creepy deep voices saying things that almost might be true, but are mostly unverifiable. One example, among many, accuses a candidate of “Voting against Montana.” Could that be true? It’s impossible to tell because it’s impossible to even know what voting against Montana even means? Obviously, the purpose of that sort of advertising is to mislead and influence.

Right now I’m on a bus from Missoula to Billings. It’s my birthday, which makes it a funny day for a bus ride. I could have stayed in Missoula, but today “he who shall not be named” is speaking there . . . and so I’m happily and anonymously riding this WiFi supplied Jefferson Lines Bus to Billings, where Rita will pick me up for a birthday dinner and poetry reading.

Political season always brings me fantasies of running for office. Today, while walking to the Missoula bus station, the fantasy was of me doing a political television advertisement. I might say something like this:

“Hey, I’m not featuring a creepy deep voice or attacking my opposition. All I want to do is look into this camera and talk directly to you. So let’s talk. Let’s talk about what you want in a Senator or Representative.

I grew up on the rural edge of Vancouver, Washington. My father owned a small business, installing window coverings. He was (and is at 92) the most honest person I’ve ever known. My mother was a traditional homemaker and worked along with my father in the family business. She was (and is) the kindest person I’ve ever known.

I’ve only got about 10 or 15 more years of a healthy active life left. And so, in honor of my parents and their values, I’d like to be a politician who will represent you with honesty and kindness. My parents also embraced the value of hard work. So let’s throw that in. I won’t be spending money on attack ads or misinformation. If you want to know where I stand on something, let’s talk. I’ll work hard to be an honest and kind representative of you and the whole state. In this advertising, all I’m asking is that you look at me, talk to me, compare me to my opponent, and then vote for the person who you think will be the most honest, kind, and hardworking person to represent you and this great state of Montana.”

Enough of the silly fantasies. My point is my birthday wish. I’m wishing today, for my birthday and for my birthday year, for a political takeover by politicians who are honest, kind, and hardworking. That’s all. They don’t have to be rich or powerful. They don’t have to have high IQs. Let’s just concentrate. Let’s just elect the honest and kind candidates and then see what happens.

Happy birthday to me.

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14 thoughts on “Happy Birthday to Me”

  1. But wait!!!! Run!!! I am in Texas and I reallllllly get how important it is. And you are honest kind and hardworking. We don’t have to tell everyone that you are also wicked smart. Might work against you. Signed

    Will go door to door Sent from my iPhone

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  2. HAPPPPPPPPY BIRTHDAAAAAAY, Sir!!! I hope it is full of love, light, joy, and all the beauty the Universe has to offer. Blessings unto you from our Heavenly Creator!!!!

  3. Can’t believe it. I almost challenged you to give in and become a politician in my Birthday wish… Decided no, since I’ve already expressed my hopes for your political future. Besides, my heart belongs to Montana….and I don’t live there. Live your fantasy, Win or lose, your message will be heard and your home state will be better for it. I will get some energy from your campaign…and maybe I will even live longer. Go for it!!! Vince

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    1. Thanks Vince. I mostly meant that I’m happy with the honesty and kindness of Williams and Tester and hope others will contrast their qualities with the dishonest and unkind politicians. But I love your enthusiasm!

  4. Why, you sound like Kathleen Williams: Smart, sincere, good values, right motivation. Happy birthday to you! And my more.

  5. Love you John, Happy Birthday. We could only dream of a politician like the one you described…unless you throw your hat in the ring.

  6. You’ve got my vote, John, and yes, I value John Tester and Kathleen for those qualities, too. Hope you had a happy birthday!

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