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Happiness, Love, Parenting, Personal Reflections, Writing

Peggy Bit Me . . . and Then She Wrote a Children’s Book

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To prevent confusion and conflation, I should note that the title of this blog post represents two separate events:

  1. In 1958, Peggy bit me.
  2. Then, in 2025, she wrote a children’s book.

Just so you know, the 2025 children’s book is NOT about that time she bit me. I’m hoping that will be her second book because I’d really love to get to the bottom of what the heck 3-year-old Peggy was thinking right before she tried to bite off my big toe. My guess it was something like, “I’ll show that chubby, whiny infant baby John a thing or two; he’s not bumping me off my youngest child throne. And if he does, he’ll be limping all the way, because he’ll be missing a toe.”

But I digress. This post is about my wonderful sister’s wonderful new children’s book. I don’t want to make a big deal about my toe injury. The “toe incident,” which people are now calling it, although still emotionally painful for me, is ancient history. Although initially a wild-rabid-feral child, my sister Peggy has grown into a gentle, kind, creative, smart, compassionate, and amazing woman. She would never bite my toe again. Right Peggy?

Peggy’s book is titled, “Catching Memories.” It’s about a unique childhood experience she had with our family (with Gayle and Peggy’s favorite brother, John, as key sibling figures), at Arch Cape, a beautiful beach on the Northern Oregon Coast. We spent many weekends at Arch Cape, as it was our maternal grandparents home.

The specific memory Peggy writes about was SO GOOD. I’m not sharing details. You’ll have to pay the big bucks, $14.99 on Amazon, to read the story. Here’s a link. Buy Catching Memories

Peggy just sent me a copy of an INCREDIBLY POSITIVE Falcon Review of her book. The review is great, because the book is great. I’m guessing Peggy did not bite the toe of the reviewer. I say this because right now I’m typing a great review and hoping Peggy will take notice:

“Catching Memories is a fabulous children’s book about a unique family experience, memories, and kindness. Peggy Lotz’s debut children’s book is written with so much love, affection, and grace that you would never suspect she tried to maim her younger brother. The book is so awesome that you’ll want a copy for your children or for yourself or both. Buy it now”

In case Peggy is reading this, I’m trying to make it clear that even though that Falcon Review guy wrote you a great review, I’ve just written and posted a rather fantastic review . . . AND you (Peggy) bit me. This fantastic review should make it clear that I’m better than that Falcon Press guy could ever hope to be . . . because the fact that I’m writing it for someone who bit me speaks to the sort of selfless and forgiving person I am. In summary: My sister bites my toe and I put aside the pain and write her a stellar review. If I haven’t made it obvious yet, I’m campaigning for the position of being Peggy’s favorite brother. Given that I’m her only brother, I have the inside track, but you can’t mess around with favorite brother stuff because one day, just when you think you’re on top of the world, the next minute your big sister might try to gnaw off your big toe with her big teeth.

All I’m saying here (Peggy), is that I’m your favorite brother. Forget about that Falcon Review guy. He’s not your brother. . . let alone your favorite!

In closing, if any of you care about me, please show it by buying a copy of my sister’s book.

Buy Catching Memories

P.S. Here’s the best thing. Peggy says there’s a chance that the marketing plan might involve creating “Gayle, Peggy, and John” dolls. . . which is simply the coolest idea ever.

If you’re curious about the original “Peggy Bit Me” story, just click here: https://johnsommersflanagan.com/2019/01/28/peggy-bit-me/

Personal Reflections

Peggy Bit Me

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Peggy Ellen (Sommers) Lotz was born on a cool, crisp day in Vancouver, Washington. The high temperature was 45 degrees. I know that because I read it in the Farmer’s Almanac. The date was January 28, 1955. That makes today her birthday. Happy Birthday Peggy!

Peggy is my older sister (but not the oldest; that distinction goes to Gayle, who will get her story later).

According to family legend, Peggy first introduced herself to me by biting my big toe. I was a newborn, my mother was holding me. Apparently, at age 2¾, Peggy didn’t appreciate me stealing all of our mother’s attention. I very much wish this incident had been video-recorded, not just for historical posterity, but also because I know it would go viral on the internet, just like the “Charlie bit me” video. Besides, if I had the video it would also mark the only time in recorded history that Peggy ever did anything mean toward anyone else.

I’ve long since forgiven Peggy for biting me. It was easy because of who she was, is, and always will be.

Throughout my childhood and teen years, Peggy would say terrible things to me like, “I’m busting with pride over you” and “I’m you’re biggest fan.” Seriously. And she meant it. I’ve read about this thing called sibling rivalry; I just never experienced it. There’s a famous psychologist named Alfred Adler who wrote about how children who are encouraged can do nearly anything. Peggy is the most flat-out encouraging person I’ve ever met. She helped me believe in myself. And that biting incident . . . well, knowing Peggy, I probably deserved it.

Peggy is pure of heart. From age 2¾—to whatever age she’s turning today—Peggy has acted toward others with kindness. Everything she does is laced with good intentions. Teach special education children. Check. Get your Master’s degree and become a school counselor. Check. Be a force for defending children from abuse. Check. Be a fantastic mom. Check. Return to the regular classroom and teach another decade because you love teaching and you love children and they love you. Check. Take care of our mother who needs caretaking. Check.

Growing up, our mom always said Peggy would become a social worker because she had empathy for everyone, took care of injured animals, and was naturally the most amiable person in our family, on our block, and maybe on the planet. If you need something, call Peggy.

Peggy is also smart and funny. Like most of us, she’s at her funniest when she’s not even trying. Take, for example, some profound “Peggy sayings.” My favorites are, “Nobody’s gonna pull the wool over my shoulders” and “You just gotta keep your shoulder to the grindstone.”

When you see her next, you might want to ask her if she has a thing about shoulders.

She also loves it when I tell the story of how surprised she was that they didn’t make her get a new driver’s license when she moved to Pullman to go to Washington State University. Be sure to ask about that too.

Peggy, today is your birthday. You being born was a happy day in the world.

I hope you know I’ve forgiven you for the biting thing. I also hope you know how much I admire you for who you are and the kindness you spread in the world. I hope you know that I know, you are a gift to me, our family, and so many more people.

And I hope you know I’m busting with pride over you, because, as you probably already know, nobody’s pulling any wool over my shoulders.

I love you Peggy. Have a fantastic birthday. You deserve it.

Parenting

Your Biggest Parenting Struggles

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Twins Together Again

When Sara and I visited Ariel Goodman’s Intimate and Family Relationship class (COUN 242) at the University of Montana, we were instantly surprised.

First surprise? It was the first question: “What was the hardest thing you ever experienced as a parent?”

Second surprise? The second question: “What’s the hardest struggle that parents face today?”

The students made their interests clear from the start. They were curious about the biggest and most difficult parenting challenges. They wanted to know the worst, first.

This wasn’t exactly what we expected from the so-called snowflake generation. These “snowflake” students wanted to know what they needed to know to get themselves prepared. For me, that didn’t quite fit the stereotype.

Sara and I both answered their questions as best we could. If you listen to the podcast episode, you’ll likely catch our themes.

You can listen to the podcast on Libsyn: http://practicallyperfectparenting.libsyn.com/

Or you can listen on iTunes: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/practically-perfect-parenting-podcast/id1170841304?mt=2

But Sara and I are only two people with two limited perspectives. This brings me to my question for you. Pretend you’re with these “snowflakers.” How would you answer their questions?

What was the hardest thing you ever experienced as a parent?

What’s the hardest struggle that parents face today?

If you have the time and inclination, let me know your answers here, on Facebook, or via email.

All my best to you in your parenting struggles (and joys).

John SF